In the Internal Family Systems model, the practice of speaking for, rather than from, parts when they are triggered is an important aspect of Self-leadership. Finally, Valarie shares what we can learn from our rage and grief, as well as the importance of connecting with our joy and our ancestors as we keep showing up for the labors of love before us. Valarie also talks about “the heart and the fist,” and why both are necessary in order to create the systemic, cultural, and environmental transformations our world needs. They explore what it is to extend love to all people without limit and how opening our hearts in this way is both an ancient and radical act. In this episode of Insights at the Edge, Tami Simon and Valarie discuss “revolutionary love” as a guiding ethic for our times. With Sounds True, Valarie has created The People’s Inauguration -a 10-day online program to help us reckon with all we have lost and point us toward a vision of the society we can build together, grounded in love. She’s the founder of the Revolutionary Love Project and author of the book See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love. Inspiration for this week’s banner image: This faith, this love, this Holy Mystery-of which we are only a small part-can only be awakened and absorbed by the silent gaze of prayer.Valarie Kaur is a seasoned civil rights activist and celebrated prophetic voice at the forefront of progressive change. Image credit: Woman and Child (Silence) (detail), Jean-Francois Millet, 1855, Art Institute of Chicago, Chicago, Illinois. References: Valarie Kaur, See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love (One World: 2020), xv–xvi, xvii. We must die to the old before the truly new can be born. Richard again: Perhaps a nondual response to Kaur’s question above is that moments of felt darkness are both a tomb and a womb. When a critical mass of people practice together, in community and as part of movements for justice, I believe we can begin to create the world we want, here and now. We birth the beloved community by becoming the beloved community. Revolutions do not happen only in grand moments in public view but also in small pockets of people coming together to inhabit a new way of being. All three practices together make love revolutionary, and revolutionary love can only be practiced in community. Loving only ourselves is escapism loving only our opponents is self-loathing loving only others is ineffective. It is not a formal code or prescription but an orientation to life that is personal and political and rooted in joy. “Revolutionary love” is the choice to enter into wonder and labor for others, for our opponents, and for ourselves in order to transform the world around us. And when we think we have reached our limit, wonder is the act that returns us to love. If love is sweet labor, love can be taught, modeled, and practiced. Love is a form of sweet labor: fierce, bloody, imperfect, and life-giving-a choice we make over and over again. I believe we can reclaim love as a force for justice for a new time. Black feminists like bell hooks have long envisioned a world where the love ethic is a foundation for all arenas of our society. Time and again, people gave their bodies and breath for one another, not only in the face of fire hoses and firing squads, but also in the quieter venues of their daily lives. Social reformers through history led entire nonviolent movements anchored in love as an ethic. But feelings alone are too fickle and fluid to sustain political action. We mostly talk about love as a flood of emotion. The problem is not with love but with the way we talk about it. If you cringe when people say that love is the answer, I do, too. I think you will find her insights quite compelling: In this liminal space we find ourselves in now, Sikh activist, civil rights attorney, and author Valarie Kaur believes that “revolutionary love is the call of our times.” She brings the fullness of her faith and her humanity to answer the questions so many of us are asking. All I know is that the only way we will endure is if each of us shows up to the labor. Is this the darkness of the tomb, or of the womb? I don’t know. Revolutionary Love Thursday, November 12, 2020 Thursday, NovemThe Transforming Power of Love
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